Mother’s Day Emptiness

Image from Google Images

This Sunday is Mother’s Day, a day that is supposed to bring love, joy and appreciation. It’s often a day of flowers, gifts, cards and even a surprise breakfast in bed. But for me, Mother’s Day is the worst day of the year. It is the day I dread the most, the day I feel the most empty.

This is what I will get for Mother’s Day from my son – just a text that says “Happy Mothers Day”! That’s it, no card in the mail or gift to be delivered. No surprise appearance at my door. I guess I should be happy at least for the text; I went 7 years without even that. Estrangement without a reasonable excuse is really a cruel and destructive act. It’s not just the single act of walking away or turning your back, the effect lasts forever, day after day, year after year. Every holiday or family moment or event, gone, empty, without purpose.

And now I have a grandchild that I have yet to see, nor am I sure I will ever get to see. There is nothing quite like a day all your own to tell you that you aren’t good enough, aren’t loved enough. I ordering Edible Arrangements to be delivered for both my own mother and my daughter-in-law. I also sent my mother a card separately. But for me, there will be nothing, not from my son anyway. I fought so hard for his rights when he was growing up. I did the right thing, did right by him. But as long as his father keeps telling lies and making up our past, and as long as my son keeps believing him, I will forever feel lonely and empty on Mother’s Day. I wish I could just skip it altogether.

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6 thoughts on “Mother’s Day Emptiness

  1. I really don’t know, what had happened between you and your son in the past, but, maybe, if you want to reconnect with him, you just need to, make the first move, because, maybe, head, waiting for that show of willingness to reconnect with you…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So sorry Sarah, I can only imagine the emptiness the day must give you thanks to the cruelty you endured/are enduring.
    There’s a place in Hell for someone like that father that would build a wall between a mother and her children. That hurts everyone involved. Guy must be a world class POS.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have always felt that you do NOT speak badly of the other parent to your child! I never once did that, even though I had a lot of ammunition and it was actually true, unlike his father’s stories. But he is my child’s father and it is not my right to come between them. If only I had been offered that same grace.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Exactly right on all points. What he has done to you via using his son is nothing less than abusive. (To both of you). A decent/normal human being would actually be encouraging the relationship, not building walls. He is indeed a true lowlife.

        Liked by 1 person

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