The New Normal?


I am sad lately, sad at where this world is heading and with this new “normal” we are seeing in basic humanity – murder based on race and revenge, acceptance of  discriminatory views in our politicians, the intentional harm perpetrated on friends and family for selfish gain. What is happening?  Why are we okay with destroying ourselves and the world we live in?

When I look at the last 7 years of my life, beginning with family drama and tragedy, and ending with the current state of our world, I see so much change for the worse that I am afraid for the future, and not just the distant future, but even next month, or next week, or tomorrow. I want to see everything on the news as distant and far removed from me and my tiny life, but the truth is that it is in my life and has been for a while. How can I be so shocked at all the pain and torment out there when my own sisters and my own son are guilty of the same? Except they didn’t intentionally harm strangers – they harmed their own flesh and blood.

What is normal anyways? I used to think it was honesty and empathy, the good in life, but now I think it is simply what we allow, good or bad, and I am seeing too much allowance of the bad lately. Is that just easier?  Is it easier to allow the bad and harder to stand up and fight for the good – I think it is. But allowing the bad doesn’t just affect others, it comes down the line and affects each of is us as well. Just take the recent police murders (revenge against innocent officers, or at least not the ones who caused the desire for revenge) and the current presidential election (what happened to voting for the right person? why are we so divided by and loyal to political parties), both are causing harm to every person in our nation and yet is seems to be the new, accepted norm.

Closer to home, with my family, the new norm is either hurt those you love, or look the other way when someone else is doing it, pretend it isn’t happening. If we can’t get our own families to love and care, then how can we expect anyone else to? At what point and under what pressure do “normal” people turn from good to bad?

It is indeed a sad time, my friends…




14 thoughts on “The New Normal?

  1. It is our duty to our children and our family and those before us and those to come, to continue this fight for what is right and good, it is a time to hold others accountable and stand up and say “I QUIT”, I quit allowing others to bully, to disrespect and ignore. It is the “new norm” they claim, we need to resist the norm and save our families and make our country strong again. We need to quit accepting and doing each and every opportunity we get and bring back “HOPE” and DREAMS”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well written… however, what I hope for is that people who hold themselves to a high standard… can co-operate to make a bigger difference, and offset some of the pain and problems.

    It’s just a hope, though… maybe an unrealistic one…. but I do know that it pays off to seek honesty, even if it is not appreciated by others, and empathy is the basis of many things, even negative things which are out of hand, like fear-mongering media: the focus on antagonism exploits the wiring in the human brain which cannot easily differentiate between synthetic danger and real danger, and which still remains even if we life free of “natural predators”. Understanding that, started with empathy and honesty, but was twisted into manipulation and exploitation.

    It continues to be exploited by people who are victims… fear takes hold and drives everything, replacing passion with obsession, and hope to foster progress with frustration at the lack of progress, and then at “the system”.

    There is a system, but they are also systems which amplify hope, and ways to foster what you want in life… so don’t give up hope nor allow your focus to only be on the problems, although they may be many.

    On a day to day level, at least as an individual we can work in hope based on honesty, and have empathy for both ourselves and a future which is more full… that’s been my general experience, but it is a continual balancing act to work with others whilst avoiding drifting, at least for me.

    I don’t think I’m really making it well enough yet, but I do think, in times like this, it is even more important to focus on maintaining, and fostering, integrity.

    For those who have access to the resources, having “free” platforms like WordPress, is a great example of empathy and honesty applied to business… (I say “free” because they are paid tiers and options, and also because there is a bit of a cost to change platforms, although mitigated somewhat by the data download option).

    WordPress itself: (begin technobusi rant)

    a lot of people hate the technical underpinnings, but the business model is sound because you can upgrade as you wish, use it in different ways, and they realize that usability, rather than technical details, matter… I just thought that up so I don’t have references to back it up but it is a better platform partially because it is trying to be as greedy as possible, whilst also maintaining some degree of compassion. Not the best way to put it, they may describe themselves as having an aspiration to be of service, at a profit. I haven’t checked what their official statement or “vision” is, but whatever they say it is, what it actually turns out to be, hopefully by intent, is a part of making the world more frictionless for expression and discussion….

    So, there is still not just hope, but some actual evidence based on the platform we are currently using.

    And even if we ourselves might not be the ones, if WordPress disappears or “turns evil” tomorrow, others can build similar or better platforms with the same ethos, if they think about it deeply enough and also have the resources to do so…

    So, that’s just an example, that’s so obvious we may miss it… this whole Internet thing is a combination of a variety of interests, but some of them are based on honesty (including the honest need to make money) and empathy (seeing a need and working out a way to service it). Some lack the business or technical skills to be competent at both, many more lack the resources to develop those skills, but I think that type of thinking has shaped every form of business since the dawn of time, and is the reason why people still choose to go to school, still buy educational products, and perhaps sadly, also sell legal self-destructive products: empathy allows for people to destroy themselves, as well as for people to construct a better world, or save themselves from a dead end.

    (end technobusi rant)

    Empathy doesn’t force construction, nor hope. Those always have to come from within, even if they are encouraged, fostered, and even induced from environs.


  3. You remind me of a quote from JK Rowling’s Harry Potter – “it is time for us to choose between what is easy and what is good”. It does take courage and caring to stand up for what is good and more courage to continue caring through the pain we sometimes feel all the more because we care. Yes, I think I also think that sometimes it is easier to shut off than feel and care, sometimes easier to act in anger rather than love. It costs us something to be loving but we really need people like you who do care and who are coming through really painful experiences doing in what ever small way we can, good and generous and kind things. These little things really do count. We can’t control everything that goes on around us but we can choose love in our actions. You are strong and doing much more good than you can see xxx


  4. Hope and the belief that humanity will prevail. Yes there is darkness but there is also the opposite of that and that is where we should focus our energies. The darkness will suck us in and lead us into blindness. Acknowledge it for what it is and embrace what we know is intuitively the right way to be. I believe we are born knowing right from wrong. Environment can only nurture our innate moral compass or destroy it. xx


  5. Yes, this is truly sad. Maybe you have hit the nail on something important. Empathy is because a concept of the past. It seems like people want to live without thinking about others 😦 Sorry it’s been such a rough time.


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