The Masks We See & Believe

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I swear I need to give up social media. Haha. No matter how far you come, how much you grow, how much you let go and move on, something on social media will always take you aback.  Maybe not a step back, but a mental beat back. Allow me to explain…

Anyone who has been reading my blog for a while knows that I am completely estranged from my sisters and I have only minimal contact with my mother and brother. Maybe not so much minimal contact as a distance has just grown, literally and figuratively. My sisters have me blocked on Facebook, which actually kind of cracks me up since I have no interest in their profiles or their lives and haven’t in some time. It does show however that they still care, in the sense that they are still wrapped up in their own drama, their own games. Anyway, their husbands did not block me so I can see when my lovely brother makes a reply to one of their posts.

Well, I guess yesterday was my sister Sandy’s wedding anniversary. Sandy is the one that found a husband with some money and it turned her into a material-loving snob. He plays emotional games with her but as long as the money is there… So, yesterday her husband made a post about loving his wife, Happy Anniversary, yada-yada-yada. Well, my brother posted a thank you to this man for making his sister happy and for being a good man.  Wow – that’s all I could think as I shook my head.

Two thoughts came to mind: 1) she can’t be that happy is she is an adult playing the ignore game on me. How happy can you truly be when you are all wrapped up in creating drama?  2) Her husband is not a good man. I know some of the mean things he had done and said to my sister before the estrangement. I remember all too well the phone calls from her when she was in tears. He is a controlling and emotionally abusive man. But that is all behind closed doors. My brother of course would never see beyond the “happy” pictures posted online and the fake smiles covering inner pain at family gatherings. It is so easy to create a great life online. Hell, I appeared wonderful online even though I was dying inside.

My brother’s post didn’t make me mad, didn’t hurt me, it just made me roll my eyes. I so don’t miss being part of all that fakeness. Those kind of things used to hurt me, pierce my heart a little, but I have grown past all that. Now, I just realize how much we don’t really know about each other, my family members that is. They believe the happy posts, take them as fact. But it’s a mask!  And no one will ever be truly happy or find the deeper truths until all the masks are removed.

I have removed mine but will anyone else?

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8 thoughts on “The Masks We See & Believe

  1. I have always called Facebook something much more accurate – “Farcebook”. Social media is the most powerful image and reputation maker in the world, sadly enough. But I always like seeing those memes that state something like “The Best Relationships are the ones that have no appearance on Social Media”. There is so much truth to that. My wife always says, “No one knows what goes on behind closed doors” and that is so powerful too. Sometimes what we see as a bad relationship, might be the most ideal in the privacy between two people; likewise, what we see as the strongest marriage, might be plagued in the intimacy of the two people.

    As an interesting side note, my sister has me blocked on FB as well. And I’m okay with that. She is so fake she tells people on her FB that she is a college graduate, but happens to be a high school dropout. She also tells people she is a Property Manager, but the reality is that she married a guy, who received rental property in an inheritance – that guy actually failed to pay the property taxes and was forced to sell all but one property. The other property might as well be condemned, since they have no money to invest in it and make it livable.
    But I never mention a word of it on her Social Media…instead, I take secret evil pleasure in watching her brag about herself to others and I know the truth.

    Am I evil? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ohhh – I love that last part! And you are not evil, maybe just the smirky smile! 🙂

      FAKE is such a terrible thing. It takes so such more work! And I admit, I did it for a while but now I refuse to and I am much happier.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Interesting – I wrote a similar post a couple of months ago titled ‘Masks’ about people using Facebook. It is interesting how social media turns people into something they are not OR it brings the true them out for everyone to see. Since that post, I stopped using Facebook and have not regretted it. Thanks for a great post! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am actually considering quitting Facebook. I tried a couple weeks ago, but then my hubby and I take a picture I want to share and couldn’t. So I went back on. I think I will consider it more after the holidays. Maybe go back to sending them event he old-fashion way – printed and sent through the actual mail. Get back to a more simple life!

      Liked by 1 person

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