This Is How I Feel

Finally! It has been difficult to explain why I emailed my sister; the words to explain just haven’t been quite right. Sometimes it is almost impossible to explain a feeling in words.

This morning I made a new playlist on my cell phone which included songs I haven’t listen to in years. I was driving, running errands, when this song came on. It is called “Bittersweet” by Plumb. The lyrics fit almost perfectly. Even though I did not get a response from my sister, wasn’t expecting one anyway, the song still fits. “We” aren’t free, but I am!  Please take a moment to listen. I think if we all let go of our bitterness, our lives would be so much more free and fulfilling. It doesn’t have to be reciprocated – even though my sister is still holding onto it so vehemently, letting go of mine freed me in a way I didn’t think possible. Yes, it is bittersweet – we can’t free our loved ones from their pain, we can only free ourselves.

Take care my friends!

“Bittersweet” Lyrics:

I’ve been carrying this old luggage,
And it’s been really bugging me.
So when you called to see me,
I couldn’t believe it.
Could it really be?

You need to feel forgiveness;
I need to feel resentment
Running down the drain.
This bruising chain I’ve carried
Is the pain that I am marrying today.

Now I can breathe,
And I feel grace rush over me.
It pours through my skin,
And lets you in,
And we are free.
Now I can breathe
And I feel grace rush over me.
It runs through my veins,
And what I taste is bittersweet.

The clock is always ticking.
Bitterness grows by the minute.
Why can’t we realize?
The wounds that we’re inflicting
On our flesh, it isn’t healing
By keeping love inside.

Now I can breathe,
And I feel grace rush over me
It pours through my skin,
And lets you in,
And we are free.
Now I can breathe,
And I feel grace rush over me.
It runs through my veins.
And what I taste is bittersweet.
Bittersweet.

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